This is just one of those things I think about at leisure, a fantasy opera named “The Birthers.” It’s entertaining to imagine how the Birther story could be told in an operatic form. I envision a cast of familiar Birther characters, and two choruses: the Birther chorus and the Obot chorus.
The opera opens with this aria sung by the character, Phil Berg:
Obama è Mobile (sung to the tune of La donna è mobile)
(Berg)
Obama è mobile
Quickly from Africa
Where his mom birthed him
There in Mombasa…
Among the lions,
Among the tigers
Then quickly home
To register his birth.(birther chorus)
Quickly home,
Quickly home
To register his birth.
Quickly home,
Quickly home
To register his birth.
Then there’s an aria by Orly Taitz titled, “Obama is Usurper.” That aria would be interrupted by the Mario Apuzzo character singing his aria “The Mouth of Truth” (I’ll keep the tune to myself for the moment).
The Mouth of Truth
(Apuzzo)
I am the Mouth of Truth.
Come to me and you’ll get the right answers.
If you believe in me
And think not for yourselves,
I’ll tell you what you should think.(birther chorus)
He is the Mouth of Truth.
He is the Mouth of Truth.
He is the Mouth of Truth.
Trust in what he says.
At that point Orly sings again, the duet with Apuzzo, “Let Me Feeneesh.” Orly begins the duet with an interminably long introduction culminating in an exasperated Apuzzo reintroducing the theme from “The Mouth of Truth.” The duet continues with increasing intensity as each singer battles for time. Just as Orly shrieks her loudest “Let Me Feeneesh!” the black-robed Judge appears and swings a giant gavel to stop them, as he begins his own aria, “Frivolous.”
Throughout the action, the Leo Donofrio character sits on the sidelines waving a thick document that no one pays attention to.
The opera is, of course, a tragedy. Infighting among the birthers, loss of job, family strife, monetary sanctions and jail time plague the characters.
Throughout, the Obot chorus intones dire warnings of the impending disaster. Some of their choruses include “Wong, You are Wong,” “99 Lawsuits,” “The Impossible Dream” and “Requiem for a Conspiracy Theorist.”
The opera marches to its inevitable conclusion as they lose case after case until the final blow arrives, the Barack Obama character, re-elected to another term, appears for the first time and sings his aria, “I do solemnly swear” to the wailing backdrop of the Birther chorus.
Just for fun.
Well done. Inspired, even!
This could go far! Opera is definitely an appropriate form.
Jackboots? Marching frogs? Got to spoof the PDF madness. A crowd of Birthers in Holmesian garb with oversized magnifying glasses .. smeared with vaseline.
The (mis)use of YouTube …. fawning crowds worshipping YouTube.
The use of the Founders as sock puppets.
A gleaming idol of Vattel, next to a massive copy of his Law of Nations on a tall grimoire.
Lots and lots of TinFoil. Perhaps some style inspiration from Metropolis!
A running gag, birthers averting their gaze in unison whenever a fov’t or Obot presents a document.
Corsi with his flag pin. You know the one.
Background cameos by the KKK.
My heart goes on … 😉
“Birther of a Notion”
To be honest, I can’t see the birther farce rating a traditional opera. Perhaps comic opera or operetta. Birthers of Penzance, anyone?
I am the very model of a modern Constitutionalist…
Brilliant!
One syllable too many! I suggest: Constitution’ist
Could be a fun term for Birther “constitutional experts”, the guys that get all hyped up on apuzo and donofrio and think they know something!
DrC:
This was great, hilarious, and very creative!!! If you do it, and need songs, just let me know. Great minds must be thinking alike because I found this old timey guy named Red Skeleton who was a clown, but also wrote a lot of music, which I am looking for one to do a Frog March to.
But on Operas, to ASK Esq., maybe the Beggars Opera or one of Sigmund Rombergs thingies. Because the Mounty Song would work well with “Here Come the Birthers” which I am also playing with. And “When I’m Suing You – ew ew ew ew ew ewwww!” Oh don’t get me started.
Squeeky Fromm
Girl Reporter
The opera won’t be over until Victoria Jackson sings.
I always figured I’d rewrite the classic Queen song somewhere along these lines:
“Birtherian Rhapsody
Where is the real file?
Where is his true BC?
Caught up in ballot trials
No escape from conspiracy
Open the book
Give Vattel a look and see…
He’s a usurper
He gets no sympathy
Because he wasn’t born
In Hawaii
All his life
Is a lie
Anything that he shows
Doesn’t really matter to me
To me…”
(will continue later 😉
(cont.)
“Mama, who is my dad?
Martha says it’s Malcolm X
Did you guys really have sex?
Mama, I was President
But then they came and frog-marched me away…
Fuddy, ooooh oooh
Didn’t mean to make you lie
If Trump hasn’t shut up this time tomorrow
Carry on, carry on with scrubbing links at Justia
Too late, I messed it up
Oh that forgery was bad, and that Minor Happersett…
Good-bye, my dear Obots, I’m busted now
Gotta leave you all behind and face the truth
Mama, oooh oooh
My teleprompter broke
I sometimes wish I were back in Kenya”
(to be continued)
(cont.)
“I see a big fat silhouetto of a man
Sheriff Joe! Sheriff Joe! Will you put me in pink tights?
Orly Taitz and Putzo giving me the boot – oh wee!
Donofrio, Donofrio
Donofrio, Donofrio
Donofrio, Apuzzo (magnifico)
I’m just a Kenyan, nobody likes me
He’s Indonesian, not an NBC
Spare the US from his communist spree
‘Showed a COLB and long form, here’s where I was born’
Holy Cao! No! Your papers you must show!
…
Oh Jerome Corsi, Jerome Corsi! Jerome Corsi please let go!
The birther mob has a gallows set aside for me, for me, for meeeee….
So you think you can fool us and be President?
You’re not white and not right-wing, yet think you’re god-sent?
Oh baby, can’t let this happen baby
Gotta get you out, gotta get you right out of office!
Though the courts may tell us
You’re an NBC
Though the courts may tell us
Nothing of that matters to me
‘Cause we’re really racist…”
Gotta go to bed now, maybe I’ll improve it some day, this just flowed out of my keyboard. 🙂
Along these lines, Australia has Keating: The Musical
Paul Keating was the Treasurer under Prime Minister Bob Hawke, then deposed Hawke to be Prime Minister himself. He was later defeated in an election by John Howard. Howard was actually visiting the White House on 9/11 (even though Bush was in Florida). Bush later appointed Howard to “Deputy Sheriff”.
In order to understand Keating: The Musical you really need a lot of background, but this is an excerpt that pretty much captures Howard’s personality:
John Howard Power
Keating was known for his tongue (and collecting antique French clocks, and his Armani suits). This vid preserves Keating at his best in Parliament, responding to a Censure Motion brought by Howard just after he had regained the leader of the opposition role.
Paul Keating v John Howard
The Australian Parliament can be really fun sometimes; the US Congress will never touch it.
Sorry, hit submit before I had fixed the link:
Paul Keating v John Howard
Oh my. You know some of us grew up with Red Skelton. Old timey, hmmpf.
That’s the way artistic inspiration works–loved it, by the way!
Ah, Clem Kadiddlehopper and Freddie the Freeloader!
Scientist:
The opera won’t be over until Victoria Jackson sings. [bada-bing]
Die Walküre: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1aKAH_t0aXA
Every time I listen to Wagner, I feel like invading Poland. – Woody Allen
VLADIMIR: We’re waiting for Godot.
ESTRAGON: You’re sure it was here?
VLADIMIR: He said by the tree. Do you see any others? What are you insinuating? That we’ve come to the wrong place?
ESTRAGON: He should be here.
VLADIMIR: He didn’t say for sure he’d come.
ESTRAGON: And if he doesn’t come?
VLADIMIR: We’ll come back tomorrow.
ESTRAGON: Hey, who’s that approaching?
VLADIMIR: It looks like Godot.
GODOT: Hi guys. I was at a Tea Party meeting, and lost track of the time. We were talking about Obama not being a natural born citizen. His father was from Kenya, and never a citizen – you know what that means.
VLADIMIR and ESTRAGON: We’ll never see our families again!
[Lightning and thunder] Curtains close.
It’s spring time for Orly and Moldavia:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?gl=BE&v=zSn_4B6OHXs
I prefer the works of Fartov and Belcher.