Birther art sale

Posted on April 4, 2011 by Dr. Conspiracy

I apologize for being slow to report this. Lucas Smith, of recent memory, is selling a work of art titled: Orly Taitz and her exhibits. It comes with a certificate of authenticity. I think the painting is funny.

The art is being auctioned on eBay.

About Dr. Conspiracy

I'm not a real doctor, but I have a master's degree.
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102 Responses to Birther art sale

  1. LMK says:
    April 4, 2011 at 2:45 am  (Quote)

    I especially like how “I, Lucas Smith” printed the “certificate of authenticity” on the back of a report card!

    I wonder what Orly will screech when she learns of this?

  3. Lucas D. Smith says:
    April 4, 2011 at 3:06 am  (Quote)

    Dear Doc Conspiracy,

    Thanks for picking up this story!

    You wouldn’t believe how much flack I am catching, from a large group of fellow birthers, for my exercising my first amendment right to freedom of speech and expression.

    I have, however, received a lot of very supportive emails and telephone calls today. I think that many people, on all sides of the political spectrum, found my forthright 8 pages of Certificate of Authenticity and Provenance to be very refreshing.

    But, as I said, many people (mostly a select group of Orly supports in Arizona and California) are not happy with me right now.

    I was to be the speaker at an event in Arizona on the 12th of this month (April). I was going to speak for more than 2 hours and then answer questions.

    I was going to tell me account of how I obtained Barack Obama’s birth certificate in Mombasa, Kenya and what I have been doing for the last 2 years now.

    It appears that now, in light of my painting of Orly Taitz and my disclosure of the Certificate of Authenticity and Provenance, that the event will is canceled.

    Reason given to me is:

    “I am sorry about this but I have to be honest. This came across as a bad move and I have run it by others in the group that were looking forward to hearing you, including those that were pre-funding the cost of the room. Initial response is that we are all finding it bizarre that you would do this, not just the painting itself but the entire sexual tone surrounding what you wrote about Orly. No one sees how this contributes towards the task of unmasking the fraud in the White House. A final decision will be made tomorrow but at the moment, it is unanimous that we will probably cancel the event.”

    My reply to them:

    I, Lucas Daniel Smith, cannot, and will not, make apologies for telling the truth.

    Most all of the male supporters are in love with, or very least, sexually aroused by her. That’s why there are literally hundreds of male ‘hands’ that want to help Orly Taitz, free of charge. Lots of them are married men and the others that aren’t claim to be Christians that would not covet the neighbors wife.

    I don’t live a world where I tuck the truth deep down in some hidden chest in my basement and then PRETEND, outside in daylight, to be a conservative traditional orthodox WASP.

    As usual, I, Lucas Smith, am punished for tell the truth.

    Look at the Republican (and also Democrat) Senators and Congressmen that have been, throughout history, caught up in sex scandals. They all wanted PRETEND to be family men that loved their wives and children and their pet dogs. Apple pie and baseball games in the summer. Yeah, yeah, they did all that but they also couldn’t help but to chase prostitutes, hot secretaries, their wife’s sister, children, and sometimes even a gay lover.

    I can’t help it if people don’t like me telling the truth.

    You want me to go away just like the most of the USA wants the ‘birthers’ to go away.

    For the record the act of “sex” as well as our natural unclothed bodies are a natural part of life.

    We have this strange notion that sex is dirty, perverted, evil and nefarious and must only be committed with a woman or man that you are have officially married (i.e., you know, a little piece of paper which is a marriage license that you a pay the government for which gives you permission to then seek a religious or secular marriage certificate) and even then it can’t be too kinky because that would just be a total sin. So, no sex until you pay the government for your sex license.

    I’m not the first guy to paint a portrait of a naked lady and I’m certainly not the most famous guy that has painted a portrait of naked lady throughout history. So what have I done that is so wrong?

    If people were worried about being involved with something that is embarrassing (e.g., me and my painting and my candid affidavit) then why in the world would they choose the have attorney Orly Taitz represent them in a serious matter of national security?

    A conservative people, with a serious grievance of national security, represented by an attorney (Taitz) that had nearly no understanding of the law? An attorney (Taitz) who has often claimed that she will have Obama out of office in 30 day? An attorney (Taitz) who often, quite often, misinterprets just about every order or ruling issued by the Courts in her litigation. An attorney (Taitz) who cannot control her mouth nor her emotions and who has train-wrecks all alliances? An attorney (Taitz) who is well known for her answer to why she isn’t seeking airtime for her start witnesses….”Because there are not tall blonds”.

    It also appears that some of the many men that love Orly Taitz are upset with me according to their comments over at The Post & Email.

    My reply:

    I live in capitalist United States of America, not the former communist Soviet Union.  I don’t need anyone’s permission to paint a semi-nude picture of them or to sell the said painting. Furthermore, the painting ‘Orly Taitz and her Exhibits’ is venerating in that it was painted in honor of Orly Taitz. I painted this work of art in an exalting fashion and in a conservative manner.

    And please tell me what is wrong with (my Certificate of Authenticity and Provenance) an artist elaborating on their opinions, background, convictions, insight and thoughts when describing a work or art? What do you think art is about? Do you think it to be some cold and void of emotion physical act of placing oil or acrylic on a canvas as a machine would do when printing out a picture?

    Orly Taitz should be honored that I painted this work of art in her image.

    I’m proud to be an American and I am proud to freely voice my opinions, expressions and first amendment rights. I live in a great country where I can express myself without having to worry about the dictator tossing me into a jail cell for making a funny joke about him or addressing a serious grievance in public.

    If you don’t like these rights that I enjoy as a proud American then I suggest you register as a Democrat before you vote in the next cycle of federal office elections.

    I rest my case. Lucas Daniel Smith

    Postscript: I have no problems with Orly Taitz and I implore her to continue with her patriotic cause. If I were her I would be very pleased with the painting. She is a very beautiful woman.

    Btw, here is the link to the eBay auction

  4. Lucas D. Smith says:
    April 4, 2011 at 3:25 am  (Quote)

    I just posted a very lengthy comment but I think it might have got caught in the moderation/spam filter.

    I’ll check here tomorrow.

    Thanks for picking up the story.

    Good night.

  5. Lucas D. Smith says:
    April 4, 2011 at 3:28 am  (Quote)

    Btw, here’s the eBay auction:

    “Orly Taitz and her Exhibits. by Lucas Daniel Smith”

    And here’s the Certificate of Authenticity and Provenance:

    “03.31.2011. Certificate of Authenticity and Provenance. Orly Taitz and her Exhibits. Painted by Lucas Daniel Smith”

    http://www.scribd.com/doc/52119416/03-31-2011-Certificate-of-Authenticity-and-Provenance-Orly-Taitz-and-her-Exhibits-Painted-by-Lucas-Daniel-Smith

  6. Scientist says:
    April 4, 2011 at 8:43 am  (Quote)

    Lucas D. Smith: Btw, here’s the eBay auction

    1 bid so far. Was that you Lucas?

  7. thefarleftView says:
    April 4, 2011 at 9:34 am  (Quote)

    The report shows that Obama for America spent $2.8 million on lawyers’ costs for corrected FEC filings and other activities in the time since he was elected in 2008, Roll Call reported.

    http://obamareleaseyourrecords.blogspot.com/2011/04/fox-news-finally-reports-obama-camp-is.html

    i dont’ see how you deathers can look yourselves in the face every morning…every single lie by you obots have been exposed. You have no credibility, none whatsoever.

  8. Scientist says:
    April 4, 2011 at 9:37 am  (Quote)

    thefarleftView: i dont’ see how you deathers can look yourselves in the face every morning…

    It’s easy when you’re as gorgeous as I am.

  9. Majority Will says:
    April 4, 2011 at 9:53 am  (Quote)

    “The report shows that Obama for America spent $2.8 million on lawyers’ costs for corrected FEC filings and other activities . . .”

    LMFAO!!!!!!!

    This idiot birther troll just exposed one of her own past lies and obviously isn’t intelligent enough to make the connection or comprehend it.

    THAT is comedy gold.

    Who’s making popcorn? 😀

  10. JoZeppy says:
    April 4, 2011 at 10:29 am  (Quote)

    Anything for a buck Mr. Smith? At least you don’t have to worry about ebay pulling this auction. I don’t think they have any rules about selling bad art.

  11. Dr Kenneth Noisewater (Bob Ross) says:
    April 4, 2011 at 10:31 am  (Quote)

    thefarleftView: The report shows that Obama for America spent $2.8 million on lawyers’ costs for corrected FEC filings and other activities in the time since he was elected in 2008, Roll Call reported.http://obamareleaseyourrecords.blogspot.com/2011/04/fox-news-finally-reports-obama-camp-is.htmli dont’ see how you deathers can look yourselves in the face every morning…every single lie by you obots have been exposed. You have no credibility, none whatsoever.

    Do you know how much McCain spent?

  12. Sef says:
    April 4, 2011 at 10:44 am  (Quote)

    Lucas D. Smith:
    Btw, here’s the eBay auction:

    “Orly Taitz and her Exhibits. by Lucas Daniel Smith”

    And here’s the Certificate of Authenticity and Provenance:

    “03.31.2011. Certificate of Authenticity and Provenance. Orly Taitz and her Exhibits. Painted by Lucas Daniel Smith”

    http://www.scribd.com/doc/52119416/03-31-2011-Certificate-of-Authenticity-and-Provenance-Orly-Taitz-and-her-Exhibits-Painted-by-Lucas-Daniel-Smith

    You’re kidding! Right? What passes for ‘art’ these days! Uggh! You can be assured if I bought this travesty that your signature would be the only thing left after I got through with it.

  13. Majority Will says:
    April 4, 2011 at 10:52 am  (Quote)

    Dr Kenneth Noisewater (Bob Ross): Roll Call

    “Legal costs for Republican nominee John McCain’s campaign and compliance committees have also increased substantially since his 2008 bid. The Arizona Senator has spent more than $1.3 million on lawyers since the election. While that amount is less than half of Obama’s post-election legal expenses, it is $200,000 more than McCain spent on legal fees before the 2008 election.”

    Birthers giggle nervously when they lie by omission.

    More . . .

    “President Barack Obama was not on the ballot in 2010, but his campaign committee outspent all other presidential campaigns last year on legal fees, refunds to contributors and payments to the Treasury Department for unusable donations.

    Obama for America has spent more than $2.8 million on legal fees since the 2008 election, according to a CQ MoneyLine study of Federal Election Commission records. In all, the president’s campaign spent three times more on lawyers after Election Day than in the two years preceding it.

    A Democratic spokesman said in a statement that the expenses were expected and not extraordinary considering that Obama’s White House run was the largest campaign in history, taking in more than $750 million.

    ‘The campaign has incurred ordinary legal expenses related to the wind-down of its operations and other legal services which all campaigns incur and which are proportional to the unprecedented size of this campaign,’ DNC National Press Secretary Hari Sevugan said.”

    Read the rest . . .
    http://www.rollcall.com/issues/56_103/Obama-Campaign-Racks-Up-Large-Legal-Fees-204489-1.html

  14. misha says:
    April 4, 2011 at 12:02 pm  (Quote)

    That’s 6th grade level. Figures.

  15. gorefan says:
    April 4, 2011 at 12:08 pm  (Quote)

    Majority Will: More . . .

    Do you know how much President Bush spent in 2000/2004/ How about Kerry or Gore?

  16. Lucas D. Smith says:
    April 4, 2011 at 12:25 pm  (Quote)

    Sef: You can be assured if I bought this travesty that your signature would be the only thing left after I got through with it.

    Now that was funny!!! hahaha!

  17. misha says:
    April 4, 2011 at 12:29 pm  (Quote)

    Sef: You can be assured if I bought this travesty that your signature would be the only thing left after I got through with it.

    Lucas D. Smith: Now that was funny!!!hahaha!

    It’s not funny; it’s the truth.

  18. Majority Will says:
    April 4, 2011 at 12:33 pm  (Quote)

    gorefan: Do you know how much President Bush spent in 2000/2004/How about Kerry or Gore?

    No, I don’t. Did you want me to research this?

    And do you mind if I ask why?

  19. Dr Kenneth Noisewater (Bob Ross) says:
    April 4, 2011 at 12:39 pm  (Quote)

    gorefan: Do you know how much President Bush spent in 2000/2004/ How about Kerry or Gore?

    Gore maybe you can look through these as I don’t have the time:

    Bush:
    http://images.nictusa.com/cgi-bin/fecimg/?C00346932
    http://images.nictusa.com/cgi-bin/fecimg/?C00388579

    Kerry: http://images.nictusa.com/cgi-bin/fecimg/?C00385070

    Gore: http://images.nictusa.com/cgi-bin/fecimg/?C00342212

  20. Dr Kenneth Noisewater (Bob Ross) says:
    April 4, 2011 at 12:42 pm  (Quote)

    Majority Will: No, I don’t. Did you want me to research this?And do you mind if I ask why?

    Will Here’s a start:

    http://www.fec.gov/finance/disclosure/srssea.shtml

  21. Majority Will says:
    April 4, 2011 at 12:58 pm  (Quote)

    Dr Kenneth Noisewater (Bob Ross): Will Here’s a start:

    http://www.fec.gov/finance/disclosure/srssea.shtml

    Thanks, Bob but I wasn’t asking. I’m not sure why gorefan brought up Bush, Kerry and Gore. In response to your post, I was just filling in the gap of McCain’s legal costs since the birther troll inadvertently left it out.

    To gorefan: Please see Bob’s link above. Thanks.

  22. Sean says:
    April 4, 2011 at 12:59 pm  (Quote)

    thefarleftView:
    The report shows that Obama for America spent $2.8 million on lawyers’ costs for corrected FEC filings and other activities in the time since he was elected in 2008, Roll Call reported.

    http://obamareleaseyourrecords.blogspot.com/2011/04/fox-news-finally-reports-obama-camp-is.html

    i dont’ see how you deathers can look yourselves in the face every morning…every single lie by you obots have been exposed. You have no credibility, none whatsoever.

    When you run for President it’s a necessity to have good lawyers on staff. Good lawyers are expensive especially in a Presidential campaign.

    That being said, what was done in the birther court cases? Very simple. A motion to dismiss. Very quick and inexpensive.

    Obviously Obama didn’t spend all that money on a few frivolous lawsuits.

  23. gorefan says:
    April 4, 2011 at 1:16 pm  (Quote)

    Majority Will: And do you mind if I ask why?

    I was just curious as to what the legal fees are for a Presidential campaign, both the winners and losers?

  24. Majority Will says:
    April 4, 2011 at 1:18 pm  (Quote)

    gorefan: I was just curious as to what the legal fees are for a Presidential campaign, both the winners and losers?

    It’s an excellent question. I think that the FEC.gov site and Roll Call would be good places to start looking.

  25. Thrifty says:
    April 4, 2011 at 3:08 pm  (Quote)

    thefarleftView: i dont’ see how you deathers can look yourselves in the face every morning…

    It was difficult for a while, but then I figured out I could use a mirror.

  26. misha says:
    April 4, 2011 at 3:11 pm  (Quote)

    thefarleftView: i dont’ see how you deathers can look yourselves in the face every morning

    Because I’m so effing good looking. Ta, ta!

  27. Slartibartfast says:
    April 4, 2011 at 3:18 pm  (Quote)

    Dr Kenneth Noisewater (Bob Ross): Do you know how much McCain spent?

    I’m sure he spent much less after the election…

  28. Slartibartfast says:
    April 4, 2011 at 3:52 pm  (Quote)

    Mr. Smith,

    It’s nice to see you doing something honest for a change – I wish you the best of luck on selling your art (I wont, however, be bidding on it…). I am surprised that you didn’t realize what kind of reaction your auction would receive from the birthers…

  29. Majority Will says:
    April 4, 2011 at 4:17 pm  (Quote)

    Slartibartfast:
    Mr. Smith,

    It’s nice to see you doing something honest for a change – I wish you the best of luck on selling your art (I wont, however, be bidding on it…).I am surprised that you didn’t realize what kind of reaction your auction would receive from the birthers…

    Isn’t it possible he stole the painting?

  30. misha says:
    April 4, 2011 at 4:25 pm  (Quote)

    Majority Will: Isn’t it possible he stole the painting?

    When it was discovered missing, the owner said “thank gawd that’s gone.”

  31. Lucas D. Smith says:
    April 4, 2011 at 4:27 pm  (Quote)

    Majority Will: Isn’t it possible he stole the painting?

    No, it is not possible that I stole the painting. I have provided pictures of myself in the physical act of creating the painting. See the eBay auction pictures.

    Thank you.

  32. Slartibartfast says:
    April 4, 2011 at 4:27 pm  (Quote)

    Majority Will: Isn’t it possible he stole the painting?

    It’s possible, but I’ll give him the benefit of the doubt on this one – at least I’ll treat it like I do Mr. Smith’s POSFKBC – I’ll assume that he created it until I see evidence otherwise… 😉

    p.s. Thanks for the awesome set-up!

  33. Lucas D. Smith says:
    April 4, 2011 at 4:31 pm  (Quote)

    Slartibartfast:
    Mr. Smith,

    It’s nice to see you doing something honest for a change – I wish you the best of luck on selling your art (I wont, however, be bidding on it…).I am surprised that you didn’t realize what kind of reaction your auction would receive from the birthers…

    Thank you. I’m very confident that Orly Taitz and her Exhibits will be worth hundreds of thousands of dollars (if not millions) some day in the future and that it will eventually be displayed in a museum.

    Buying this painting now at a ground floor price is a wise investment.

    Thank you again for your honest thoughts.

  34. Lucas D. Smith says:
    April 4, 2011 at 4:34 pm  (Quote)

    misha: When it was discovered missing, the owner said “thank gawd that’s gone.”

    Ha! That was seriously funny! hahahahajajajjejeje!

  35. Dr Kenneth Noisewater (Bob Ross) says:
    April 4, 2011 at 4:36 pm  (Quote)

    Lucas D. Smith: Thank you. I’m very confident that Orly Taitz and her Exhibits will be worth hundreds of thousands of dollars (if not millions) some day in the future and that it will eventually be displayed in a museum.Buying this painting now at a ground floor price is a wise investment.Thank you again for your honest thoughts.

    Lucas the only way it will be worth hundreds of thousands or more is if its buried for centuries or you die a tragic death.

  36. Lucas D. Smith says:
    April 4, 2011 at 4:36 pm  (Quote)

    Slartibartfast: It’s possible, but I’ll give him the benefit of the doubt on this one – at least I’ll treat it like I do Mr. Smith’s POSFKBC – I’ll assume that he created it until I see evidence otherwise…

    p.s. Thanks for the awesome set-up!

    Very quick witted and clever. I respect that.

  37. misha says:
    April 4, 2011 at 4:39 pm  (Quote)

    Lucas D. Smith: Ha! That was seriously funny!hahahahajajajjejeje!

    I was in a clinical study of a cure for the common cold. The pill contained pigeon milk. The unfortunate side effect was that I constantly had the urge to crap on a windshield.

  38. Majority Will says:
    April 4, 2011 at 4:41 pm  (Quote)

    “I have provided pictures of myself in the physical act of creating the painting. See the eBay auction pictures.”

    Wouldn’t it be cool if there was a sophisticated software program that could alter images to make it look like something it isn’t?

    You could use it in a “shop” to alter a “photo”. I hope some company develops something amazing and powerful like that some day.

    Just imagine what convicted forgers, pathological liars and con artists could do with such a program.

    http://blogs.photopreneur.com/the-worlds-most-famous-photoshop-fakes

  39. Lucas D. Smith says:
    April 4, 2011 at 4:43 pm  (Quote)

    Dr Kenneth Noisewater (Bob Ross): Lucas the only way it will be worth hundreds of thousands or more is if its buried for centuries or you die a tragic death.

    It’s a called a calculated risk. You (anyone, not specifically you) buy the painting now for some between $350 to maybe $1200.

    It’s very likely that before Obama completes his highly likely second term as president that this painting that I painted will be worth a ginormous sum of money.

    If you can’t afford at least $350 on a ‘calculated risk’, which is what all capitalistic ventures are, then you don’t need to even be contemplating the outcome in the first place.

    Thank you.

  40. Lucas D. Smith says:
    April 4, 2011 at 4:44 pm  (Quote)

    Majority Will:
    “I have provided pictures of myself in the physical act of creating the painting. See the eBay auction pictures.”

    Wouldn’t it be cool if there was a sophisticated software program that could alter images to make it look like something it isn’t?

    You could use it in a “shop” to alter a “photo”. I hope some company develops something amazing and powerful like that some day.

    Just imagine what convicted forgers, pathological liars and con artists could do with such a program.

    http://blogs.photopreneur.com/the-worlds-most-famous-photoshop-fakes

    Everything is a conspiracy theory to you, isn’t it?

  41. Majority Will says:
    April 4, 2011 at 4:46 pm  (Quote)

    Dr Kenneth Noisewater (Bob Ross): Lucas the only way it will be worth hundreds of thousands or more is if its buried for centuries or you die a tragic death.

    He should accept money people print themselves in their basement. It would be more sheer hypocrisy to refuse homemade currency or at the very least stolen checks.

  42. Lucas D. Smith says:
    April 4, 2011 at 4:50 pm  (Quote)

    misha: I was in a clinical study of a cure for the common cold. The pill contained pigeon milk. The unfortunate side effect was that I constantly had the urge to crap on a windshield.

    Ha! You have a knack for this comical stuff! Very funny indeed! haha!

  43. Majority Will says:
    April 4, 2011 at 4:51 pm  (Quote)

    Lucas D. Smith: Everything is a conspiracy theory to you, isn’t it?

    Only if “everything” is distinctly limited to the zero credibility of a convicted con artist and forger who has spent a lifetime mastering the art of scamming innocent people without a shred of conscience or respect for the law. Then yes.

  44. Sef says:
    April 4, 2011 at 4:54 pm  (Quote)

    Lucas D. Smith: It’s very likely that before Obama completes his highly likely second term as president that this painting that I painted will be worth a ginormous sum of money.

    Lucas, you’re a true seer!

  45. Lucas D. Smith says:
    April 4, 2011 at 4:54 pm  (Quote)

    Majority Will: He should accept money people print themselves in their basement. It would be more sheer hypocrisy to refuse homemade currency or at the very least stolen checks.

    Printing ‘homemade’ US currency is illegal and you could go to the penitentiary for doing that. Attempting to pass stolen checks is also illegal.

    I suggest that you pay all debts in an authentic currency of your choosing.

    I trust that my foregoing advice was helpful.

  46. Dr. Conspiracy says:
    April 4, 2011 at 4:57 pm  (Quote)

    I must admit, I didn’t catch the double meaning of “Exhibits” until today.

  47. Lucas D. Smith says:
    April 4, 2011 at 5:03 pm  (Quote)

    Dr. Conspiracy:
    I must admit, I didn’t catch the double meaning of “Exhibits” until today.

    Dear Doc Conspiracy,

    Don’t worry about not catching that at first. Lots of people are slowly discovering the more intricate double, and sometimes triple and quadruple significances, of not only different aspects of the painting itself but also the Certificate of Authenticity and Provenance which to the average mind might appear to be just an odd rambling.

    Thanks again for covering the story.

  48. Lucas D. Smith says:
    April 4, 2011 at 5:15 pm  (Quote)

    Again, for the record, no one should be upset with this painting.

    Furthermore, Orly Taitz should be thrilled that I painted a work of art in her image. Physically or visually she is a very beautiful woman and I did my best to depict this in the painting.

    I was expressing my first amendment rights to freedom of speech and expression. I don’t need anyone’s permission to paint them nude or in any other fashion. I’m bewildered at the amount demands I have received from fellow birthers to the effect that I need to take the auction down immediately, destroy the painting and issue attorney Taitz a tender apology.

    What’s next, I won’t be able to paint a nude picture of the next republican president or voice my grievances against the said republican president. That’s not the world that I live in. If I want that I will move to Cuba. Btw, I have been to Cuba and I admire Fidel Castro. I don’t, however, agree with many of his policies.

    Lucas

  49. Dr Kenneth Noisewater (Bob Ross) says:
    April 4, 2011 at 5:35 pm  (Quote)

    Lucas D. Smith: It’s a called a calculated risk. You (anyone, not specifically you) buy the painting now for some between $350 to maybe $1200.It’s very likely that before Obama completes his highly likely second term as president that this painting that I painted will be worth a ginormous sum of money.If you can’t afford at least $350 on a calculated risk’, which is what all capitalistic ventures are, then you don’t need to even be contemplating the outcome in the first place.Thank you.

    You’d make more money forging Heltan Mangana’s signature on it. Maybe you should make that your artist name?

  50. Thrifty says:
    April 4, 2011 at 5:48 pm  (Quote)

    Lucas, you do realize that your first amendment rights only protect you from censorship by the government, right? Private parties are free to tell you to shut up until they’re blue in the face.

  51. G says:
    April 4, 2011 at 5:56 pm  (Quote)

    Lucas D. Smith: Again, for the record, no one should be upset with this painting.Furthermore, Orly Taitz should be thrilled that I painted a work of art in her image. Physically or visually she is a very beautiful woman and I did my best to depict this in the painting.I was expressing my first amendment rights to freedom of speech and expression. I don’t need anyone’s permission to paint them nude or in any other fashion. I’m bewildered at the amount demands I have received from fellow birthers to the effect that I need to take the auction down immediately, destroy the painting and issue attorney Taitz a tender apology.What’s next, I won’t be able to paint a nude picture of the next republican president or voice my grievances against the said republican president. That’s not the world that I live in. If I want that I will move to Cuba. Btw, I have been to Cuba and I admire Fidel Castro. I don’t, however, agree with many of his policies.Lucas

    Lucas,

    I too wish you luck on your sale and support your right to explore freedom of expression and legal artistic endeavors and to sell them for profit.

    Of course from your standpoint, this is your “baby” and will seem invaluable in your eyes. My advice, overhype can do as much harm as good and let it just be open for sale on its own merits. After all, the true measure of worth is in the hands of the buyer and what they are willing to pay for something. I hesitate to speculate on its current or future value for those reasons.

    Orly as “Queen of the Birthers” may have gotten some notoritiy for now, but honestly, at some point, the whole birther nonsense will be relegated to a crazy footnote in history, so who knows what esoteric segment of the population will even remember who she is as time goes on. In today’s 24×7 infotainment news cycle, there’s always a few new kooks appearing on the stage to grab all they can of their 15 minutes of fame before fading back away into the dustbin of obscurity. So, it is probably a good idea to market that painting and try to get what you can for it now. Art and pop culture related collectible items are very difficult things to attach speculative future value towards. They can easily go down as well as up in value. Yesterday’s hot commodity is often today’s discard that nobody wants. So bottom line, I guess strike now while you think the embers on Orly are still warm, but don’t worry about what happens to your art after it is sold.

    Further, beauty is in the eye of the beholder. I don’t doubt that folks like you and many of her followers find her physically attractive. Each to their own and different strokes for different folks. However what we each find attractive is one of the most subjective criteria out there. Even if Orly wasn’t a bat-s**t crazy birther, I still wouldn’t see the physical appeal in her. From her croppy-moppy hair to her overdone lashes and excess makeup, her type of physical appearance is more of a turn-off to me and her voice adds to the cringe factor. So as I said, each to their own. I only point this out to convey that her phsyical appeal is far from universal.

  52. Sef says:
    April 4, 2011 at 6:08 pm  (Quote)

    G: Further, beauty is in the eye of the beholder. I don’t doubt that folks like you and many of her followers find her physically attractive.

    Until she speaks. Sort of like some of the silent movie stars who never could make the transition to talkies.

  53. misha says:
    April 4, 2011 at 6:11 pm  (Quote)

    Sef: Sort of like some of the silent movie stars who never could make the transition to talkies.

    Like Douglas Fairbanks.

  54. Lucas D. Smith says:
    April 4, 2011 at 6:58 pm  (Quote)

    Thrifty:
    Lucas, you do realize that your first amendment rights only protect you from censorship by the government, right?Private parties are free to tell you to shut up until they’re blue in the face.

    I think that you’ve missed my point.

    Yes, of course, people have the right to tell me to shut up or whatever they want to tell me.

    I was referring to it being IRONIC (ironic) that such “defenders of our freedoms” (republicans/conservatives) are demanding that their voice be heard and their constitutional rights not be abridged.

    Yet the moment when these same rights goes against their views it becomes a sin and the right no longer applies. Sort of like the pedophile book that I referenced in my 8 page Certificate of Authenticity and Provenance.

    I have to say that I am somewhat shocked that someone like you, a poster at Doc Conspiracy’s blog, would not understand what I am was talking about when it comes to the ironic and double standard of out fundamental rights being applied only when convenient or our in favor.

    I trust that I have explained this effectively now.

    Thank you.

  55. Sef says:
    April 4, 2011 at 7:02 pm  (Quote)

    Lucas D. Smith: I think that you’ve missed my point.

    Yes, of course, people have the right to tell me to shut up or whatever they want to tell me.

    I was referring to it being IRONIC (ironic) that such “defenders of our freedoms” (republicans/conservatives) are demanding that their voice be heard and their constitutional rights not be abridged.

    Yet the moment when these same rights goes against their views it becomes a sin and the right no longer applies. Sort of like the pedophile book that I referenced in my 8 page Certificate of Authenticity and Provenance.

    I have to say that I am somewhat shocked that someone like you, a poster at Doc Conspiracy’s blog, would not understand what I am was talking about when it comes to the ironic and double standard of out fundamental rights being applied only when convenient or our in favor.

    I trust that I have explained this effectively now.

    Thank you.

    Let’s put it this way, Lucas. You ain’t no Picasso.

  56. Lucas D. Smith says:
    April 4, 2011 at 7:03 pm  (Quote)

    G: Lucas,

    I too wish you luck on your sale and support your right to explore freedom of expression and legal artistic endeavors and to sell them for profit.

    Of course from your standpoint, this is your “baby” and will seem invaluable in your eyes.My advice, overhype can do as much harm as good and let it just be open for sale on its own merits.After all, the true measure of worth is in the hands of the buyer and what they are willing to pay for something.I hesitate to speculate on its current or future value for those reasons.

    Orly as “Queen of the Birthers” may have gotten some notoritiy for now, but honestly, at some point, the whole birther nonsense will be relegated to a crazy footnote in history, so who knows what esoteric segment of the population will even remember who she is as time goes on.In today’s 24×7 infotainment news cycle, there’s always a few new kooks appearing on the stage to grab all they can of their 15 minutes of fame before fading back away into the dustbin of obscurity.So, it is probably a good idea to market that painting and try to get what you can for it now.Art and pop culture related collectible items are very difficult things to attach speculative future value towards.They can easily go down as well as up in value. Yesterday’s hot commodity is often today’s discard that nobody wants.So bottom line, I guess strike now while you think the embers on Orly are still warm, but don’t worry about what happens to your art after it is sold.

    Further, beauty is in the eye of the beholder.I don’t doubt that folks like you and many of her followers find her physically attractive.Each to their own and different strokes for different folks.However what we each find attractive is one of the most subjective criteria out there.Even if Orly wasn’t a bat-s**t crazy birther, I still wouldn’t see the physical appeal in her.From her croppy-moppy hair to her overdone lashes and excess makeup, her type of physical appearance is more of a turn-off to me and her voice adds to the cringe factor.So as I said, each to their own.I only point this out to convey that her phsyical appeal is far from universal.

    Dear G,

    Thank your for the excellent advice. And I mean that. You appear to be a very bright individual. It’s was very refreshing to read a logical piece of advice.

  57. Lucas D. Smith says:
    April 4, 2011 at 7:05 pm  (Quote)

    Sef: Let’s put it this way, Lucas.You ain’t no Picasso.

    Thank you for your candid opinion.

  58. misha says:
    April 4, 2011 at 7:07 pm  (Quote)

    Sef: Let’s put it this way, Lucas. You ain’t no Picasso.

    I’ve seen cave paintings that are better.

  59. G says:
    April 4, 2011 at 7:13 pm  (Quote)

    Lucas D. Smith: Dear G,Thank your for the excellent advice. And I mean that. You appear to be a very bright individual. It’s was very refreshing to read a logical piece of advice.

    Lucas,

    Thank you for the kind words. I have always been honest and sincere in my replies to you and have been clear on which things upon which we absolutely don’t agree or that I don’t buy into. I may have very different viewpoints and tastes than you do, but I don’t have a problem with that.

    I do wish you would have replied more to my posts on Cryptids…as that at least is an area of shared interest. I’ve still been waiting to hear some insights on which other cryptids you find of interest and if there are any links you can provide to either your previous posts on the topic or sites that you also like for keeping up on such matters. I tend to take a scientific approach and healthy skepticism to such matters; but the topic fascinates me nonetheless and I’m definitely not close-minded to finding real answers to the unexplained.

  60. Lucas D. Smith says:
    April 4, 2011 at 7:39 pm  (Quote)

    G,

    Well, I’m tremendously interested in the following cryptids:

    1. Emela-ntouka

    2. Badigui (or Nguma-monene).

    I have always (or at least since a young teen) been fascinated by the many animals that are unique to equatorial Africa.

    I have taken notes on Mbembe for many years and I believe that I have an account to tell like none other. I haven’t seen Mbembe with my own eyes but I have recorded and analyzed lots of information that I don’t believe others have taken seriously, or rather, the time in painstakingly investigate.

    I do plan to publish a book (and not a self-published one).

  61. Lucas D. Smith says:
    April 4, 2011 at 7:42 pm  (Quote)

    misha: I’ve seen cave paintings that are better.

    Ha! Your are very talented! I like the jokes, they are truly funny.

  62. G says:
    April 4, 2011 at 8:19 pm  (Quote)

    Lucas D. Smith: G,Well, I’m tremendously interested in the following cryptids:1. Emela-ntouka2. Badigui (or Nguma-monene).I have always (or at least since a young teen) been fascinated by the many animals that are unique to equatorial Africa.I have taken notes on Mbembe for many years and I believe that I have an account to tell like none other. I haven’t seen Mbembe with my own eyes but I have recorded and analyzed lots of information that I don’t believe others have taken seriously, or rather, the time in painstakingly investigate.I do plan to publish a book (and not a self-published one).

    Ah! Thank you!

    Fascinating. I’ve heard of those two…(and also under some variant spellings).

    Personally, I “group” certain cryptid legends, as I’ve often felt that if there were such undiscovered creatures, they would need to have sufficient poplulations and territories (or at least broader territories in pre-modern times) and therefore it is important to look for a broader region of local stories of similar type creatures. Many local populations have their own names for things and individual encounters and descriptions can vary with memory over time…yet all be pointing to being about the same type of creature.

    …so what I’m getting at is I like that particular grouping you mentioned, because I view all of them as similar enough to tales of Mbembe to indicate broader support of an overall cryptid having existed in that area, of which many of these tales probably refer to the same species of creature. I’d add the Chipekwe to that category…and of course there are others, as there are so many different names & tales from that region!

    The general Congo region (including forests, lakes & rivers) is easily one in which I expect additional nature discoveries to be made and definitely could support populations of large sized animals still unknown to modern science -both aquatic and terrestial in nature. So much of the area really is hard to reach or explore properly. I would like to see most of that wilderness protected of course, but also hope that various biologists get to explore it in more detail. I think there has to be something to a lot of these natives stories…
    Anyways, just wanted to share my thoughts on that. Thanks for sharing!

  63. J. Edward Tremlett says:
    April 4, 2011 at 9:31 pm  (Quote)

    Lucas D. Smith: Thank you. I’m very confident that Orly Taitz and her Exhibits will be worth hundreds of thousands of dollars (if not millions) some day in the future and that it will eventually be displayed in a museum.

    Actually, no.

    You see, Lucas, I have a time machine. And I am going to go into the past, ten seconds at a time, and steal the painting about a thousand times, so as to have a thousand copies.

    Then I will sell them to interested parties in double-blind auctions.

    So there will be 1000 copies of the painting, none of them worth more than the materials used to make them, every one a potential forgery.

    I do this because I have a TARDIS. Also because a giant duck named Gregory has stolen my liver and replaced it with a small plastic statue of the Buddha.

    That wooshing sound was your magnum opus vanishing.

  64. Sef says:
    April 4, 2011 at 10:01 pm  (Quote)

    J. Edward Tremlett: Actually, no.

    You see, Lucas, I have a time machine. And I am going to go into the past, ten seconds at a time, and steal the painting about a thousand times, so as to have a thousand copies.

    Then I will sell them to interested parties in double-blind auctions.

    So there will be 1000 copies of the painting, none of them worth more than the materials used to make them, every one a potential forgery.

    I do this because I have a TARDIS. Also because a giant duck named Gregory has stolen my liver and replaced it with a small plastic statue of the Buddha.

    That wooshing sound was your magnum opus vanishing.

    All they have to do is X-ray them and find the one without the “X” in magic marker.

  65. greatkim says:
    April 4, 2011 at 11:46 pm  (Quote)

    Mr.Smith,

    and who is amberloves_god, the seller from Tucson Az ?

    8 hardcover new books sold. Same origin as the previous set of (21 if I remember well) “Going Rogue” ?

    I know you love distractions and this one is quite well conceived but still:

    1 How come your forgery is signed by a Chief Administrator who hadn’t yet been appointed to the position on the date stamped on the document ?

    2 How come this Chief Administrators spells (and stamps) his name differently than what reported by the Medical Board of Kenya (an official governmant body that registers medical practiotioners – linked by me in a previous thread). +

    Mik Taerg:
    Dr.Conspiracy, Mr.Smith,

    concerning the Historical Flaws I would like to point out that Heltan is now Maganga’s official name according to the Republic of Kenya and not just to various Kenyan news sites.

    In 2011 The Gazette of Kenya has published
    MEDICAL PRACTITIONERS RETENTION REGISTER, 2010

    first of all you need to know what the Law of Kenya

    THE MEDICAL PRACTITIONERS AND DENTISTS ACT

    (Cap. 253)

    is

    it is explained here:

    http://www.kenyalaw.org/kenyalaw/klr_app/view_content.php?ContentHistoryID=2292

    the above law also exlains that there is an official regiter of precticing doctors and that

    5. (1)For the purpose of this Act, there shall be a registrar of Medical Practitioners and Dentists.

    (2) The Director of Medical Services shall be the Registrar, and shall perform such duties in connection with the register as are prescribed by this Act.

    (3) The Registrar shall keep a register of medical practitioners and dentists in the prescribed form. ”

    now let’s go to the “official” register signed by the official registrar

    Dr. Francis M. Kimani
    Director of Medical Services
    Ministry of Medical Services
    (also found here: http://www.statehousekenya.go.ke/government/medical_services.htm)

    http://medicalboard.co.ke/index.php?option=com_wrapper&view=wrapper&Itemid=35

    something about the medical board not just any online directory (quoted from the above site)

    “The Medical Practitioners and Dentists Board is a statutory authority established under Cap 253 Laws of Kenya to regulate the practice of medicine and dentistry in the country………………

    ……………………….

    Medical Practitioners & Dentists Board Functions ….
    ……

    REGISTRATION AND LICENCING

    1.To direct and supervise the compilation and maintenance of a register and all records required to be kept under sections 6,13,14,15 of the Act.
    2.To regulate private practice.
    3.To such things as are incidental to the performance of all or any of the foregoing functions.”

    here is the specific name listed

    MAGANGA, HELTAN MNJAMA P. O. BOX 41009 MOMBASA 80100 MBChB(Nbi)1993 M.Med(Nbi)2001 GENERAL SURGERY

    So according to the Government of Kenya Heltan is the correct spelling

    I well know this is tedious and boring stuff and that our attention should be 100% focused on your latest masterpiece

  66. US Citizen says:
    April 5, 2011 at 12:45 am  (Quote)

    If the painting includes darts or lighter fluid, I might be interested.
    I’ve already cleaned all my kitty litter boxes and have no fish to wrap, so small incentives might help convince me.

    Also, is there a “Burn It Now” price?

  67. J. Edward Tremlett says:
    April 5, 2011 at 12:51 am  (Quote)

    Sef: All they have to do is X-ray them and find the one without the “X” in magic marker.

    *slides that poster a beer*

  68. misha says:
    April 5, 2011 at 1:05 am  (Quote)

    US Citizen: Also, is there a “Burn It Now” price?

    It’s still at $350. Who would pay 50¢ for that travesty? Maybe Orly is the one bidding, so she can destroy it.

  69. Sef says:
    April 5, 2011 at 1:11 am  (Quote)

    J. Edward Tremlett: *slides that poster a beer*

    See https://secure.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/wiki/City_of_Death for the reference. Note that this is essentially the same story as DNA’s Dirk Gently story.

  70. Majority Will says:
    April 5, 2011 at 8:21 am  (Quote)

    misha: It’s still at $350. Who would pay 50¢ for that travesty? Maybe Orly is the one bidding, so she can destroy it.

    Why give an unrepentant thief, birther, sociopath, admitted statutory rapist and scammer even one cent?

    The only art he knows is the con.

  71. Dr Kenneth Noisewater (Bob Ross) says:
    April 5, 2011 at 8:57 am  (Quote)

    misha: It’s still at $350. Who would pay 50¢ for that travesty? Maybe Orly is the one bidding, so she can destroy it.

    I call shenanigans. Look at the profile for the seller. The picture posted on the profile is stolen from Getty’s stock images

    http://www.gettyimages.com/detail/77339884

    For those who don’t know tineye.com is a wonderful site where you can cross reference pictures on the internet.

    Also the one bidder has no bidding history and is most likely another profile created by the seller to boost the price. It’s going to backfire though.

  72. Majority Will says:
    April 5, 2011 at 9:04 am  (Quote)

    Dr Kenneth Noisewater (Bob Ross): Also the one bidder has no bidding history and is most likely another profile created by the seller to boost the price. It’s going to backfire though.

    In other words, it could be a scam. I’m shocked.

  73. Thrifty says:
    April 5, 2011 at 9:43 am  (Quote)

    Lucas D. Smith: I think that you’ve missed my point.
    Yes, of course, people have the right to tell me to shut up or whatever they want to tell me.
    I was referring to it being IRONIC (ironic) that such “defenders of our freedoms” (republicans/conservatives) are demanding that their voice be heard and their constitutional rights not be abridged.
    Yet the moment when these same rights goes against their views it becomes a sin and the right no longer applies. Sort of like the pedophile book that I referenced in my 8 page Certificate of Authenticity and Provenance.
    I have to say that I am somewhat shocked that someone like you, a poster at Doc Conspiracy’s blog, would not understand what I am was talking about when it comes to the ironic and double standard of out fundamental rights being applied only when convenient or our in favor.
    I trust that I have explained this effectively now.

    There’s no irony or hypocrisy. Nobody’s first amendment rights come into play here, at all.

  74. Keith says:
    April 5, 2011 at 11:53 am  (Quote)

    OK. Smith has made this personal now, dragging my home town into it.

    Have a look at the details of the notary on this f’ing thing: it says the Notary’s address is 2847 S 6th Avenue, Tucson Arizona 85713.

    Well campers, that address is actually in the City of South Tucson, a proud metropolis of some 5500 souls residing in a one square mile big, fiercely independent community incorporated since 1940, boasting one of the highest crime rates in the country, and some of the finest Mexican restaurants on the planet. It is completely surrounded by the City of Tucson, but it is most definitely NOT the City of Tucson.

    The address is at the corner of 39th Street, and the South Tucson city limits extends to 40th street (numbered avenues run north-south, numbered streets run east-west).

    I smell yet another forgery from the convicted felon.

  75. Dave says:
    April 5, 2011 at 1:30 pm  (Quote)

    I dunno, Keith, sometimes mailing addresses and actual city names differ. I know several cases where people have a particular city as their mailing address when they live miles from the city. Princeton, NJ is an example.
    Anyhow, I checked that address at the usps.com zipcode checker, and it has no problem with calling that Tucson. So, at least as a mailing address, it appears to be legit.
    Besides, why forge this? There is no reason.

  76. Lucas D. Smith says:
    April 5, 2011 at 2:15 pm  (Quote)

    Dear Kieth,

    What are you, Wikipedia or something?

    And why do you brag your ‘home town’ (sic) up by saying that South Tucson is “boasting one of the highest crime rates in the country”. Does that make you proud Kieth? What, are you some sort of wanna-be gangster of something?

    Btw, those crime stats that you cite are ‘per capita’. Do you know what that means, Kieth (or do the poor people of South Tucson not have access to education?).

    Let me spell it out for you, when we are talking about a small city, 5000 people, it makes the crime stats “appear”, on paper, much more egregiously prevalent. For example, a group 50 people could commit enough crimes in a years time to make it appear that a city of 5000 was infested too hilt with dangerous crime.

    Kieth, in truth, the crime in South Tucson is perpetrated by wannabes that are, frank, wussies. So please don’t pretend that you your little city is ‘hard’. If you saw me in person, in South Tucson, you wouldn’t say a word to me because you know you’d get your little peanut head messed up.

    The city of South Tucson was Tucson up until sometime in the 1940s when the square mile of land that is now South Tucson incorporated. This had nothing to do with being “fiercely independent” and was more of a legal strategy for government benefits and entitlement programs.

    In closing, I doubt that you are really “from” South Tucson or that you’ve spent much time there. You weren’t even aware that ‘Tucson’ is often used on mail addresses there and that most people in Tucson don’t even recognize any difference between South Tucson and Tucson.

  77. James M says:
    April 5, 2011 at 2:35 pm  (Quote)

    Keith: 2847 S 6th Avenue, Tucson Arizona 85713

    That’s way more “strip mall off the 10” than it is “South Tucson”.

    If someone said they lived in that neighborhood, it would be a bit of a red flag, but for an office location, you could do worse.

    I don’ t mean to defend Smith, and in fact, am breaking my promise to myself to not participate here if he remains, but the boundaries between what is “South Tucson” and what is “the economic sphere of the interstate and the airport” tend to be pretty fuzzy.

    I will say for certain, that a couple of blocks north of that office is simply awful. By “awful” I mean “apparently lawless” with a painfully obvious drug trade, hookers openly working in the streets, etc. Example, the Wienerschnitzel (hot dog place) at E. 32nd St. and S. 6th Ave. is a *really* scary place, by any urban standards.

    For the record, I know about this neighborhood because I’ve done work to help the homeless, not because I’m a crackhead. But I’m damn sure not going to mince words and sugar coat this part of Tucson. It’s awful. It’s awful by Philadelphia or Detroit or Central Los Angeles standards. But I don’t consider Smith’s notary office to be “in” that awful part. I’m thinking it’s more like a mailbox place that’s just close enough to the VA hospital to have decent business (which is a very good one, as VA hospitals go — I’ve worked there).

    There’s a world of difference between “right off I-10” and “South Tucson in the East 30s streets.”

    James (of Tucson)

  78. Lucas D. Smith says:
    April 5, 2011 at 3:01 pm  (Quote)

    James M: That’s way more “strip mall off the 10‘ than it is “South Tucson”.

    If someone said they lived in that neighborhood, it would be a bit of a red flag, but for an office location, you could do worse.

    I don’ t mean to defend Smith, and in fact, am breaking my promise to myself to not participate here if he remains, but the boundaries between what is “South Tucson” and what is “the economic sphere of the interstate and the airport” tend to be pretty fuzzy.

    I will say for certain, that a couple of blocks north of that office is simply awful.By “awful” I mean “apparently lawless” with a painfully obvious drug trade, hookers openly working in the streets, etc.Example, the Wienerschnitzel (hot dog place) at E. 32nd St. and S. 6th Ave.is a *really* scary place, by any urban standards.

    For the record, I know about this neighborhood because I’ve done work to help the homeless, not because I’m a crackhead.But I’m damn sure not going to mince words and sugar coat this part of Tucson.It’s awful.It’s awful by Philadelphia or Detroit or Central Los Angeles standards.But I don’t consider Smith’s notary office to be “in” that awful part.I’m thinking it’s more like a mailbox place that’s just close enough to the VA hospital to have decent business (which is a very good one, as VA hospitals go — I’ve worked there).

    There’s a world of difference between “right off I-10‘ and “South Tucson in the East 30s streets.”

    James (of Tucson)

    Dear James,

    It’s apparent the you are “upper crust”. For you to compare South Tucson to Detroit! hahahahah! hhhahahaahhahah! Or Philadelphia? !!!!!!

    It’s apparent, like many white people, you are sacred by what “appears” to be a bunch of people (often non-Anglo Saxons) hanging around outside.

    OMG. South Tucson = Detriot, Philadelphia or Central Los Angeles. hhaha LOL!

    Oh James, how do you know about Detroit? What, did you travel there for business and you looked out from your can drive and saw all the black people walking around and you got scared? I have family in Detroit and I can assure you that South Tucson will NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER be a Detroit. So don’t embarrass yourself with any more scared white person comments, ok?

    And why would you paint Philadelphia with such a broad brush?

    Perhaps, because as you say, you are from Tucson, and having said that we I can assume that you have a different version in your head of what is ‘awful’ or what the ‘slums’ are.

    From what I see of Tucson it’s pretty much a very easy going place and there’s not really anywhere that even remotely qualifies as a ‘bad area’. So maybe you base your ‘awful’ on a sliding scale as which is more of a scale of ‘really good to a not as good’.

    Yes, I too noticed some ‘hookers’ on South 6th Avenue in South Tucson. It’s not really scary or dangerous, it’s just some few ugly women trying to make a buck. Wow, imagine that.

    James, my advice to you would be to stay VERY VERY VERY VERY far away from Detroit, I don’ want you to have a heart attack when you finally see (and not just from the airplane or your cab drive) an ‘awful’ and economically depressed place where you might not survive the night (or even the day).

    Lucas (of the planet earth)

  79. US Citizen says:
    April 5, 2011 at 3:01 pm  (Quote)

    Geez Lucas, for a guy that harps about education and “spelling things out” for them, could you possibly take the time to learn that Keith is spelled e first, then i?
    I know these small details have always eluded you, but as a convicted forger you should try a little harder if you’re going to make this a career.

  80. Lucas D. Smith says:
    April 5, 2011 at 3:06 pm  (Quote)

    US Citizen:
    Geez Lucas, for a guy that harps about education and “spelling things out” for them, could you possibly take the time to learn that Keith is spelled e first, then i?
    I know these small details have always eluded you, but as a convicted forger you should try a little harder if you’re going to make this a career.

    Dear US Citizen,

    I willlist doest my bestest in el futuro whens I writes outs me comments en eso blog in tha future.

    Thanx!

  81. James M says:
    April 5, 2011 at 3:22 pm  (Quote)

    Lucas D. Smith:

    Dear James,

    Smith, don’t even try to correspond with me. I will not read you. That is all.

  82. misha says:
    April 5, 2011 at 3:26 pm  (Quote)

    James M: It’s awful by Philadelphia

    Depends on what part of Philly. I live in Chinatown, and it’s another universe from North Philly, or West Philly.

    My best friend’s studio is in North Philly, and it’s a scary place at night – which is why she has two Rottweilers. Also, some addicts broke into her building one night by carving away the concrete holding the window bars. She let the Rottweilers do their job.

    Then there are the row houses in North Philly. I dropped a studio assistant off at her mother’s. The windows all had bars, and the front porch was enclosed by iron gates and more bars. Fortress Philly.

    Oh, then there’s the school teacher who attends our workshops. A little friction with some students set his career back:

    “Two students accused of attacking a teacher in a hallway of Germantown High School on Friday morning are now behind bars. The teens allegedly pushed Burd, who struck his head on a locker. Schools CEO Paul Vallas said Burd broke his neck in two places. He was taken to Einstein Medical Center, but showed no sign of paralysis. Burd, a popular math and photography teacher, is recovering in intensive care at Einstein Medical Center. He remains in critical but stable condition. He is expected to have surgery on Monday.”

    http://abclocal.go.com/wpvi/story?section=news/local&id=5062501

    Then there was the subway assault, literally around the corner from me:

    “A teenager who testified against 3 others, learned his sentence in connection with the beating death of a Starbucks manager on a Philadelphia subway concourse. The attack happened in March, 2008 in a subway concourse at 13th and Market Streets. Sean Conroy died of an acute stress-induced asthma attack during the beating. All five teens had skipped school in North Philadelphia to head to a downtown mall, according to prosecutors. The teens were on the subway platform when someone challenged another group member to hit someone, and Conroy was punched from behind, authorities said. A police officer soon observed four teens beating and kicking the man. By the time the officer got to him, Conroy was on his knees, gasping for breath. He was pronounced dead within the hour.”

    http://abclocal.go.com/wpvi/story?section=news/local&id=7200472

  83. Judge Mental says:
    April 5, 2011 at 4:32 pm  (Quote)

    Beautiful ???!!!

    I’m no oil painting and where the female sex are concerned have been known to have my head ruled by the lower portions of my body…..but I really don’t think I would pork that woman in a very dark room after a pint of Rohypnol.

  84. sfjeff says:
    April 5, 2011 at 7:00 pm  (Quote)

    I thought of Lucas when I read this:

    $300,000 Penalty for Bribery of Foreign Officials
    The Securities and Exchange Commission has assessed a $300,000 civil penalty against a major manufacturer of metal packaging for beverages, foods and household products to settle charges that the company bribed Argentinean government employees to secure the importation of prohibited used machinery and the exportation of raw materials at reduced tariffs. According to the SEC, the company learned soon after it acquired an Argentinean subsidiary that employees of that firm may have made questionable customs payments and caused other compliance problems before the acquisition, including false customs declarations and the destruction of documents. However, the SEC said, the weak internal controls of the company and its subsidiary made it difficult to detect the bribes, which therefore continued after the acquisition.

  85. Dr. Conspiracy says:
    April 5, 2011 at 7:09 pm  (Quote)

    sfjeff: I thought of Lucas when I read this:

    $300,000 Penalty for Bribery of Foreign Officials

    I do not think that there is anything remotely approaching sufficient evidence to indict Lucas Smith for bribing a foreign official. 👿

  86. Keith says:
    April 5, 2011 at 8:31 pm  (Quote)

    Dear Lcuas

    Lucas D. Smith:
    Dear Kieth,

    What are you, Wikipedia or something?

    And why do you brag your ‘home town’ (sic) up by saying that South Tucsonis “boasting one of the highest crime rates in the country”.Does that make you proud Kieth?What, are you some sort of wanna-be gangster of something?

    Don’t be silly, I wasn’t bragging about that, I was listing some facts about the place. The Mexican restaurants in South Tucson are the finest on the planet, that part is boasting, and fact.

    Btw, those crime stats that you cite are per capita’.Do you know what that means, Kieth (or do the poor people of South Tucson not have access to education?).

    Let me spell it out for you, when we are talking about a small city, 5000 people, it makes the crime stats “appear”, on paper, much more egregiously prevalent.For example, a group 50 people could commit enough crimes in a years time to make it appear that a city of 5000 was infested too hilt with dangerous crime.

    and your point is? I have never experienced anything more than minor shoplifting in South Tucson, but the proprietor of the Stewart Boots factory (finest handmade boots in America) there has worn a gun on his hip since the 70’s because of numerous attempts and perceived threats. It isn’t new and I didn’t say it was ‘infested’, and I did say ‘rate’, I know exactly what the statistics mean.

    For the record, the last time I visited my brother, who lived on the north side near Casas Adobes, there were drive by shootings 5 nights in a row. Nobody got hurt, they were just ‘celebrating’. South Tucson is not ‘hell on earth’ and it isn’t the only place in the valley with problems.

    However, one thing that South Tucson is very definitely infested with is non-banking ‘Check Cashing’ shops (including one in the same building as your notary public – coincidence?). There is nothing wrong with that of course, but I suspect they would not be too happy knowing that someone of your, um, background was doing business in their neighborhood.

    Kieth, in truth, the crime in South Tucson is perpetrated by wannabes that are, frank, wussies.So please don’t pretend that you your little city is ‘hard’.If you saw me in person, in South Tucson, you wouldn’t say a word to me because you know you’d get your little peanut head messed up.

    You obviously don’t know wussy when you see it in the mirror. Geeze, get a life.

    The city of South Tucson was Tucson up until sometime in the 1940s when the square mile of land that is now South Tucson incorporated. This had nothing to do with being “fiercely independent” and was more of a legal strategy for government benefits and entitlement programs.

    FAIL. South Tucson was never part of the City of Tucson. It incorporated to avoid that eventuality, and the city sales tax that went with it (and also the closer scrutiny that officials and ‘business men’ were subject to). South Tucson actually loses a lot more financial benefit by being independent than they would if they were legally and financially part of Tucson. Independence has its price and the powers that be have always been satisfied with that.

    FAIL again.

    True, I lived in Tucson, not South Tucson, however, my zipcode growing up in Tucson was 85713, the same as your notary public. 85713 covers a lot of ground, and South Tucson is only a small part of the postal zone. The post office uses the Zip Code, not the locality name to route a letter, you don’t even need to put locality names on letters anymore.

    Mail addresses are not the same as registered legal offices. Notaries have certain rules they need to follow. Just like when the State of Hawai’i certifies that someone was born in Honolulu, they mean that person was born in Honolulu, not Mombasa. When a notary says something was signed in front of him in Tucson, and then gives a South Tucson address he is giving false testimony.

    In closing, I doubt that you are really “from” South Tucson or that you’ve spent much time there. You weren’t even aware that Tucson’ is often used on mail addresses there and that most people in Tucson don’t even recognize any difference between South Tucson and Tucson.

    I went to Junior High (7th and 8th grade) about a mile from your notary’s office, on the other side of the freeway and High School about 3 or 4 miles away. I worked in some of the South Tucson restaurants while in High School and while going to the U of A (go Cats!). I partied there, visited the dog track, etc, etc, etc. It is another city, not the other side of the moon

    The place is (‘was’ is more accurate) my ‘turf’. What the h#11 are you doing in South Tucson to get your steaming pile of caca notarized? Don’t they have check cashing facilities in Iowa, or are you barred from the premises or something?

    James M: the Wienerschnitzel (hot dog place) at E. 32nd St. and S. 6th Ave. is a *really* scary place, by any urban standards.

    Really? Things have changed. I worked at the ‘Weiner’ when I was in High School. Different place though, the building I worked was the ‘A’ frame building that has the Mexican seafood shop now (at least I think that is what it is)

    I have never had much of a problem in South Tucson. Like I told Lcuas, it was my turf. And I’m a ‘gringo’. But we didn’t have anywhere near the crime you describe. I was never robbed when I worked at Weiner’s, but I was when I worked at El Taco on Speedway just off the U of A campus.

    Dave:
    I dunno, Keith, sometimes mailing addresses and actual city names differ. I know several cases where people have a particular city as their mailing address when they live miles from the city. Princeton, NJ is an example.
    Anyhow, I checked that address at the usps.com zipcode checker, and it has no problem with calling that Tucson. So, at least as a mailing address, it appears to be legit.
    Besides, why forge this? There is no reason.

    I agree, 85713 covers a large area, including all of South Tucson and a large part of the Tucson south west side.

    My point is that a notary public should be giving his full legally registered address. This address is in the City of South Tucson not the City of Tucson. There is nothing wrong with the neighborhood, or the office location (I’m guessing its the Insurance Broker, because Lcuas wouldn’t go into a Check Cashing shop, would he?).

    It is the lack of attention to detail, similar to getting the Hospital Administrator wrong, that speaks to the possibility of a forgery to me.

    Why on earth would Lcuas go all the way to Tucson from Cedar Rapids to get it notarized? Don’t they have notaries in Iowa? It doesn’t make sense.

    The Iowa State football team was in town in September, that’s a long time to hang around licking his wounds after a beat down.

  87. Keith says:
    April 5, 2011 at 8:41 pm  (Quote)

    Lucas D. Smith: What are you, Wikipedia or something?

    See, that’s your problem. Wikipedia doesn’t have the city limits for South Tucson listed, so you couldn’t have possibly known.

    Had you actually been there you might have seen the sign that says “Welcome to South Tucson” as you drive up 6th from the freeway.

  88. J. Edward Tremlett says:
    April 5, 2011 at 9:15 pm  (Quote)

    Lucas D. Smith: So please don’t pretend that you your little city is ‘hard’. If you saw me in person, in South Tucson, you wouldn’t say a word to me because you know you’d get your little peanut head messed up

    How does one forge a beatdown?

  89. Rickey says:
    April 5, 2011 at 9:21 pm  (Quote)

    Dr. Conspiracy: I do not think that there is anything remotely approaching sufficient evidence to indict Lucas Smith for bribing a foreign official.

    At a minimum, there would have to be evidence that Smith ever visited Kenya, evidence which is sorely lacking.

  90. Rickey says:
    April 5, 2011 at 9:54 pm  (Quote)

    Far be it from me to defend the forger/con artist Lucas Smith, but Tannya Gaxiola Gaxiola is an Arizona notary, and she has an office called QuikHelp which is located in the strip mall on S. 6th Avenue.

    http://quikhelptucson.com/about/

  91. Dr. Conspiracy says:
    April 6, 2011 at 1:57 pm  (Quote)

    Mrs. Conspiracy as absolutely forbid me to bid on it.

  92. Slartibartfast says:
    April 6, 2011 at 2:04 pm  (Quote)

    Dr. Conspiracy:
    Mrs. Conspiracy as absolutely forbid me to bid on it.

    Oh well, I’m sure that Mr. Smith will get a second bidder eventually… (assuming that the first bidder is not just his sockpuppet). You wife seems to be a woman of class and taste. 😉

  93. Dr. Conspiracy says:
    April 6, 2011 at 2:23 pm  (Quote)

    Slartibartfast: You wife seems to be a woman of class and taste.

    True, but I think mainly she didn’t like the exhibits.

  94. Slartibartfast says:
    April 6, 2011 at 2:25 pm  (Quote)

    Dr. Conspiracy: True, but I think mainly she didn’t like the exhibits.

    I compliment your wife’s sophistication and you respond with that pun – I guess it’s true what they say… opposites attract! 😉

  95. Lucas D. Smith says:
    April 6, 2011 at 2:29 pm  (Quote)

    Dr. Conspiracy:
    Mrs. Conspiracy as absolutely forbid me to bid on it.

    Oh, come on Doc. You know as well as I do that the painting is a good investment. Granted it is a calculated risk, as all capitalist ventures are.

    Your name will be, of course, listed on the ‘Transfer of Ownership’. The document will be signed, dated and notarized. And I will only say good things about you and your semi-objective blog (Btw, that is a compliment. Your blog is the best Obot blog).

    Think about it. No need to respond to my comment here. I recommend bidding right at the last moment right before the auction ends. However, make sure you have a good internet connection (I assume you do) because you don’t want a slow connection to register your bid several seconds late because the auction could close before your bid registers.

  96. Sef says:
    April 6, 2011 at 2:34 pm  (Quote)

    Lucas D. Smith: Oh, come on Doc.You know as well as I do that the painting is a good investment.Granted it is a calculated risk, as all capitalist ventures are.

    Your name will be, of course, listed on the Transfer of Ownership’. The document will be signed, dated and notarized. And I will only say good things about you and your semi-objective blog (Btw, that is a compliment. Your blog is the best Obot blog).

    Think about it.No need to respond to my comment here. I recommend bidding right at the last moment right before the auction ends.However, make sure you have a good internet connection (I assume you do) because you don’t want a slow connection to register your bid several seconds late because the auction could close before your bid registers.

    Well, the bidding certainly has been at a feverish clip so far.

  97. Lucas D. Smith says:
    April 6, 2011 at 2:39 pm  (Quote)

    Slartibartfast: Oh well, I’m sure that Mr. Smith will get a second bidder eventually… (assuming that the first bidder is not just his sockpuppet).You wife seems to be a woman of class and taste.

    I can assure you that the first bidder is not a ‘sockpuppet’.

    I am totally against ‘shill bidding’ and I refuse to apply such tactics.

    The more savvy of eBay community tend to strike right at the last moment. Not always though, sometime several bidding wars explode even on day one.

    I think if Doc wins the auction he will have a great story to tell here on his blog.

  98. Sef says:
    April 6, 2011 at 3:16 pm  (Quote)

    Lucas D. Smith: I can assure you that the first bidder is not a sockpuppet’.

    I am totally against shill bidding’ and I refuse to apply such tactics.

    The more savvy of eBay community tend to strike right at the last moment.Not always though, sometime several bidding wars explode even on day one.

    I think if Doc wins the auction he will have a great story to tell here on his blog.

    You might sweeten the pot by adding something collectors really want. Maybe a pet rock that you, yourself have caught and trained, not one of those store bought ones. You could paint a little smiley face on it. Or maybe a chip off the glacier with Slarti’s signature.

  99. Scientist says:
    April 6, 2011 at 3:22 pm  (Quote)

    Lucas D. Smith: You know as well as I do that the painting is a good investment

    If it will be worth a fortune some day, why are you wiiling to part with it (especially for a non-reserve price)?

  100. Dr Kenneth Noisewater (Bob Ross) says:
    April 6, 2011 at 3:26 pm  (Quote)

    Lucas D. Smith: Oh, come on Doc. You know as well as I do that the painting is a good investment. Granted it is a calculated risk, as all capitalist ventures are.Your name will be, of course, listed on the Transfer of Ownership’. The document will be signed, dated and notarized. And I will only say good things about you and your semi-objective blog (Btw, that is a compliment. Your blog is the best Obot blog).Think about it. No need to respond to my comment here. I recommend bidding right at the last moment right before the auction ends. However, make sure you have a good internet connection (I assume you do) because you don’t want a slow connection to register your bid several seconds late because the auction could close before your bid registers.

    Will it be signed by Helton Mangana?

  101. Daniel says:
    April 6, 2011 at 4:08 pm  (Quote)

    Lucas D. Smith: Your name will be, of course, listed on the Transfer of Ownership’. The document will be signed, dated and notarized.

    Wow, a title document from a convicted forger.

    Where do I stand in line to pay? lol

  102. JoZeppy says:
    April 6, 2011 at 6:37 pm  (Quote)

    Lucas D. Smith: I am totally against shill bidding’ and I refuse to apply such tactics.

    Wow…a convicted forger and admitted child molester with ethics?

    Lucas D. Smith: The more savvy of eBay community tend to strike right at the last moment. Not always though, sometime several bidding wars explode even on day one.

    And sometimes, people just don’t bid on it….but you never can be sure with the birther community….afterall folks keep hitting the paypal button for Orly. As they say, “a fool and his money…>”

    Lucas D. Smith: I think if Doc wins the auction he will have a great story to tell here on his blog.

    I suppose “great story” is relative. I would hope the Dr has better things to throw his money at. Perhaps buying some premium swampland in Florida? Or a bridge in NYC?

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